Some People....

I have been traveling. A lot. In fact, i haven't had a full weekend home in a month. I get back in town on Friday and am flying out again Sunday afternoon. This past weekend was no different. Due to my travel plans I had to miss the final session of Conference, bolt to the airport, wait to be picked up by the shuttle bus, circle the parking lot a few times, only to realize my terminal was going to be the last one on the drop-off route. Instead of being at the mercy of this driver, who refused to be a part of the Universe of Harvey, I got off at Terminal D, checked in on American with minutes to spare, then book it to the opposite side of DFW Airport in time to be one of the last to board and literally the last one to stuff my bag into the overhead compartment. Everyone else had to check their stuff. Whew...I made it! Despite all that, I was pretty calm and collected, looking at it like I squeezed every possible second out of my weekend as possible.

We were making our way out to the runway when the pilot came on and said we had to go back to the gate for some missing paperwork. That's when, let's call him Jerry the Jerk, piped up behind me. Something about American Airlines screws him over every time, there's nothing wrong with the plane or the weather, just AA's incompetence, blah blah blah. The guy sitting next me said Jerry had been like this ever since he first arrived at the gate area, making a big scene at the desk. Jerry then proceeded to pound on the flight attendant call button and berated the poor lady with demands for answers along with his professional opinions on the current situation followed with "How are YOU going to compensate ME for YOUR mistake?"

We ended up getting to Laguardia a whole 15 minutes after our planned arrival.

OK...I bring up Jerry to contrast with another person I observed that same trip. Fast forward 24 hrs. I had spent most of the day laboriously training a supplier up on Long Island. Being exhausted I decided to just head to Chili's right next to the hotel...usually not a big fan but they can grill up a decent slice of salmon. Just after I was seated entered a father and daughter who sat in the booth just in front of me.

The dad looked like your average middle-age business type, but I could tell there was something different about the daughter from the start. She was probably in her early 20s, a bigger girl with her short brown hair done up in pigtails. As she walked she was bobbing her head constantly and had her hands up to the side of her face wiggling her fingers. The best way I can describe it was she looked like she was doing sign language gibberish. I pretty much instantly lost interest in the book I was reading on my iphone and focused in on them. I know, kinda creepy eavesdropping but I love people watching and being an expert at reading people (and a borderline know-it-all), I thought I knew exactly how this was going to play out. Dang, was I wrong...

I quickly learned her name was Carmen because her dad was constantly addressing her. "Carmen, calm down" or "Carmen, stop staring" or "Carmen, put down the knife." While he studied the menu, I noticed Carmen didn't even glance at it; she was too busy coloring.

"Dad, I only have green, blue, and orange crayons but I don't have a red one. Are there orange peppers?"
"Yes sweetie," he said, still deciding on what he's going to order.
"Do they taste like peppers or do they taste like oranges?"
"More like peppers"
"I'm going to make my pepper an orange pepper but it's going to taste like an orange"
"So, you're going to have a pepper-shaped orange?"
"No Dad, it's still a pepper"

Amanda the waitress came up and took my order then when over to their booth to take theirs. He ordered something for him and then he looked at Carmen who blurted out, "Chicken fingers!"

He asked, "Is there a way she could get BBQ sauce instead of ranch dressing?"
For the first time, Carmen's head stopped bobbing as she whipped it around and focused on Amanda; anticipating her reply as if the entire fate of the tri-state area depended on her answer. I could see in Carmen's eye that she thought she was on the verge of something magnificent, something almost too good to be true and it all hinged on Amanda.
"Oh, I think I can make that happen," Amanda said with a wink to Carmen.
It was as if someone just told her Your mom is going to pull through surgery just fine. I'm pretty sure BBQ sauce is a standard option, but the look on her face, and the fact she didn't even breathe for about 30 seconds as she processed all that was happening was priceless...

Amanda left, Dad pulled out his blackberry and Carmen went back to coloring her pepper-shaped orange. It wasn't long before she was either done or got bored. The head bobbing slowly started to increase in intensity and then the hands came up again signing gibberish in the air until she was full-blown rocking out. I was thinking she was about to have an episode, but Dad just glanced up his blackberry and looking at her over his glasses smiled and said, "you're really excited for those chicken fingers, huh?"
"YES! Holy cow, YES!"
"Shhhhhhh...calm down, sweetie. They'll be here soon. Carmen, calm down...tell me about what you did with Cody today."

I couldn't figure out if Cody was a dog or a friend. Apparently she slipped into Carmenese 'cause I was completely lost and either Dad was feigning comprehension or he was fluent in Camenese.

It wasn't long before the food came. Again, the look on her face said it all. It had nothing to do with her physical appetite, but more like she had just gotten a puppy for Christmas. For several moments she just sat there, head bobbing, hands doing the gibberish thing in anticipation.

"Carmen, stop starring and start eating. Look, you got BBQ sauce."

She started to eat, picking up the little cup of BBQ sauce, bringing eye-level and then dipped a chicken tender in all the way until it couldn't go any more...seemingly memorized by it.

"Carmen..."
"Sorry Dad," she said as she quickly stuffed it in her mouth.

This routine continued until the last one which she treasured and savored. While nibbling on it, she looked up on the wall and studied a picture. You know how some Chili's have pictures of like Billy Jean and his blue ribbon at the De Soto, Texas Chili Cook-off, or some ranchers doing rancher stuff like it's an authentic Texan establishment? Well the one Carmen had her sites set on was one of a small-town beauty queen from like 1987 riding horseback in a parade. I mean, the bangs on this chick put tsunamis to shame.

"I want to be her friend."
"Hum? Why do you say that?"
"She looks nice"
"What makes her nice?"
"She's smiling and waving at me. Dad, where is she from?"
"I would probably guess Texas."
"Have I ever been to Texas?" she asked, pulling her gaze away from the picture for the first time and looking across the table to him.
"No, honey. No you haven't"
"Are there nice people in Texas?"
"Some of the nicest people are in Texas. And they have good BBQ sauce."
"Texas sounds nice. One day," now staring at the final nub of a chicken tender, "I'm going to go to Texas and talk to nice people and eat some good bar-b-q sauce."

They finished up their meal, paid the bill, and as they got up to leave, Carmen smiled and waved like a beauty queen to everyone on their way out of the restaurant.

Couple things struck me. First of all, how often do we get so inconvenienced and turn into Jerry the Jerk, blowing up at people, making demands, and being an over-all SOB? I look at Carmen's dad and even though I have no idea what his life is like, I'm fairly confident it's a bit more inconvenient than he originally foresaw and yet he never snapped at Carmen, rolled his eyes, or ignored her.

The second thing I noticed was how different I felt in both situations. On the plane, I felt anxious, frustrated, and annoyed. Most of it was directed at Jerry, but soon the circumstances in general started to tick me off. On the other hand, just seeing the interaction between Carmen and her dad for a quick meal at a Chili's on Long Island made me want to almost get up and give her a huge hug for being such a beautiful person. I literally felt myself smiling the entire time at dinner and for most of the rest of the evening, despite how tired and stressed I was. I guess what I am trying to say is we can't help but to be infectious. Our attitudes not only can govern ourselves and those we directly interact with, but also everyone around us. People's spheres of influence vary, some are large enough to light up or drag down an entire room while most others are much more limited, but I think the principle is the same.

I'm not quite sure what I'm trying to say, and for some reason I feel like I'm teaching my gospel doctrine class right now instead of blogging, but what I do know is I left Chili's a different person, a better person, because of the effect a couple people who I prematurely misjudged.